Post by: desertboy on March 10, 2003, 01:42:00 AM
Rules of competition
1. I reserve the right to give my eprom to whoever I feel like
2. In the event of a low response or lame jokes I'll give it someone else
3. No racist Jokes (Ones about Irish or women are OK)
4. No whiinging I'll ignore you
1.1 Eprom Pal Xbox never been used on live, I will never use this xbox on live.
Was asking money now just asking for a laugh
Post by: desertboy on March 10, 2003, 02:11:00 AM
Well, I guess I may as well try, since the offer is on the table! Here are some of my fav links:
1.
Introduction:
"Working in an electrical store in sunny Croydon, I get the opportunity to play with lots of expensive gadgets without actually having to pay for them. =)
To help break the monotony one quiet day, I fixed a £400 digital camera onto a £10 remote control car using electrical tape and set off to harrass pigeons. The results are below."
http://www.jkf9.btin.../PigeonCam1.wmv
http://www.jkf9.btin.../PigeonCam2.wmv
2.
Wait until the music starts playing, and then move your mouse around the picture. It's a lot better if you move him to the beat. I was laughing so hard I pulled some crappy and obscure neck muslce.
http://www.carlbaldw...o.uk/glendance/
3.
Fun jumping game! I actually had more fun killing the kid off than making the jumps. But hey, that's just me. Well made in any case! To make him jump click in the radar (you'll see) for power of jump and angle.
http://www.superdude..._escape/pop.php
4.
Finally we know the answer - who will win the desktop wars?
http://www.divstivs.plus.com/iconwar/
5.
And lastly.. something not exactly funny, but rather cool. It's an air car. As in a car that runs on air!
http://www.theaircar...infeatures.html
That's it! It's entirely possible that you've already seen these, but I thought I'd take a shot at that elusive eeprom! Been banned since November, don't ya know.
Post by: desertboy on March 10, 2003, 01:53:00 PM
I'd thought I could try and double my chances!
Here are some more that I found:
1.
http://www.thingsmyg...rguedabout.com/
2.
http://www.despair.com/
3.
This guy thought he could easily make fire. It took him 6 days. And I've now unconsciously memorized how to do it.
Read the whole story, it's worth it!
http://www.cockeyed..../firefirst.html
4. This is a game. I don't know how to play it. And neither will you. It's very customizable - you can change the character's hair color. That's about it. Oh and you can do a fairly decent tarzan imitation and plant seeds. It's very cute but completely psychotic.
http://www.palaisdet...1/opniyama.html
5.
Corky and the Juice Pigs were a Canadian comedy music band of the 90s. Their debut album "The Debut Album" featured a jaunty little number about Pandas. Nice little accompanying animation!
http://www.tomandphi...r.co.uk/pandas/
6.
Beer loving Kiwi Simon Jansen has built a beer cooler powered with a jet engine. The photos are great. Sadly this cooler doesn't fit into the back of his new car and he wants you to give him a spare turbo - if you have one.
http://www.asciimation.co.nz/beer/
7.
Spacehijackers are holding a party on the London underground on the 14th of March. They plan to take over a carriage and "corrupt peoples future experience of the Circle Line, as the memory of the party will recur each time they use the train." Brilliant idea, shame that the site doesn't tell us where to meet them.
http://circlelineparty.org.uk/
8.
Experience the ultimate simulation.
http://b3ta.com/real...rnet-simulator/
9.
Oddly disturbing.. but strangely addictive. Click on the faces.
http://www.ericmyer....stereotypes.htm
10.
Have you always wondered what you are? Well wonder no more. Put your name or any other thing in the field and hit enter.
http://thesurrealist...uk/priorart.cgi
WHEW! Compiling these lists is hard work! But it'll all be worth it if I get the prize! Hope you enjoy some of these, at least!
--------------------
What the hell I'll give you my eprom you win Zimzamzoom No one else responded today so I'm giving it away see rule 1
Zimzamzoom they'll be an eprom serial number in your email tomorrow I don't get home till 6pm give me 5 minutes to load config magic and write my eprom down and I'll send it straight to you.
Post by: LumbraX on March 10, 2003, 02:16:00 PM
| QUOTE (zimzamzoom @ Mar 10 2003, 10:02 PM) |
| Oh MAN! You ROCK! Thank you so much, you have no idea how much I appreciate this! All you other people SELLING your eproms, take a cue from the oh-so-generous desertboy, who appreciates a good laugh! And just for the sake of it, I'm glad you liked (some of?) those links. Now you can spam all of your friend's inboxes for months to come. Thanks again  |
lol You did even post and you get the EPRom. What kind of BS is that? lol
Post by: desertboy on March 10, 2003, 02:33:00 PM
| QUOTE (zimzamzoom @ Mar 10 2003, 11:02 PM) |
| Oh MAN! You ROCK! Thank you so much, you have no idea how much I appreciate this! All you other people SELLING your eproms, take a cue from the oh-so-generous desertboy, who appreciates a good laugh! And just for the sake of it, I'm glad you liked (some of?) those links. Now you can spam all of your friend's inboxes for months to come. Thanks again |
Actually this makes me feel rather bad. I tried to sell it for 20 then a tenner then when I realised no one was going to pay me actual money (Not that surprising really) I thought F*ck it I'll give it away. As for your links some of them are pretty cool. The fire starting one and the circlelineparty seem cool. This friday I might be pushing it but I reckon I'm going to be there I'll be wearing a space impact T shirt(3310 shooter).
And no I'm not a spotty teenage mobileaphobe I have my reasons for the T shirt and we'll leave it at that.
Post by: desertboy on March 10, 2003, 02:43:00 PM
| QUOTE (LumbraX @ Mar 10 2003, 11:16 PM) | ||
lol You did even post and you get the EPRom. What kind of BS is that? lol |
You may well be a moderator but I get bored easily and Zimzam seems to really really want it so what can I say I like helping people. I love Xbox scene and I have an eprom float through my hands from time to time so if anyone else wants to leave a joke or whatever I'll send my next one to the best one. (Normally every month or 2 I chip a friends xbox and we don't/won't use live) It might seem wierd but I actually l don't like gaming with people who aren't my friends.
I did say rule 1 I can give to who I choose no one else responded I posted the links to try and stimulate interest but no one posts so I thought what the hey maybe if I do this again I should do it in another section.
I will only ever give 1 eprom to 1 person and it will never be used at least by me.
Post by: SERPHeN on March 10, 2003, 02:48:00 PM
Post by: desertboy on March 10, 2003, 03:00:00 PM
Post by: blueinfinity on March 10, 2003, 03:34:00 PM
>of talks in a new peace process.
>
>When George sits down, he notices three buttons on the side of Saddam's
>chair.
>
>They begin talking.
>
>After about five minutes Saddam presses the first button.
>
>A boxing glove springs out of a box on the desk and punches Bush in the
>face.
>
>Annoyed, Bush carries on talking as Saddam laughs.
>
>A few minutes later the second button is pressed.
>
>This time a big boot comes out and kicks Bush in the shin.
>
>Again Saddam laughs, and again George carries on talking, not wanting to put
>off the bigger issue of peace between the two countries.
>
>But when the third button is pressed and another boot comes out and kicks
>Bush square in the privates, he's finally had enough.
>
>I'm headin' back to Washington!" he calmly tells the Iraqi.
>
>"We'll finish these talks in two weeks in Washington!"
>
> A fortnight passes and Saddam flies to the United States for talks.
>
>As the two men sit down, Hussein notices three buttons on Bush's chair and
>prepares himself for the Yank's retaliation.
>
>They begin talking and George presses the first button.
>
>Saddam ducks, but nothing happens.
>
>George snickers.
>
>A few seconds later he presses the second button.
>
>Saddam jumps up, but again nothing happens.
>
>Bush roars with laughter.
>
>When the third button is pressed, Saddam jumps up again, but again nothing
>happens.
>
> Bush falls on the floor in a fit of hysterics.
>
>"Forget this," says Saddam.
>
>"I'm going back to Baghdad!"
>
>George W. says through tears of laughter, "What Baghdad?"
Post by: aragorn23 on March 10, 2003, 04:37:00 PM
2) I once had a girlfriend... One of her legs was longer than the other... Her name was Eileen.
-Aragorn23
Post by: zimzamzoom on March 10, 2003, 04:37:00 PM
| QUOTE (desertboy @ Mar 10 2003, 07:00 PM) |
| I feel touched by this evening antics. After discussing with a colleague (Of sorts) I shall have another eprom for giving away. I'm sure tomorrow evening zimzam will back me up that I sent him a working eprom I expect more jokes or do you want the egg joke to win. |
Sure thing! Can't wait to finally find some people to play Unreal against.. XBC is practically Halo-only.
Post by: EriCCire on March 10, 2003, 05:13:00 PM
Post by: gainpresence on March 10, 2003, 05:25:00 PM
| QUOTE |
| Typhoon rips through cemetery; hundreds dead. |
Post by: blueinfinity on March 10, 2003, 06:51:00 PM
| QUOTE |
| Drove by the cemetary people are dieing to get in there |
Post by: gsxr on March 10, 2003, 08:35:00 PM
"SuperMan is flying around the city, and he spots WonderWoman sun-bathing in the nude. She is on the top of a building legs spread enjoying the sun.
SuperMan who has been super horny lately decides to go for it. He swoops down onto WonderWoman, and gives her the old in and out, at super speeds. Then in a wink of an eye he flies off satisfied.
WonderWoman opens her eyes and says "What the f*** was that?!?"
......And the invisable man says "I have no idea, but my a** is killing me!!!"
btw I have no use for an Eprom. I was just posting this joke up for the hell of it. I think it's pretty funny, plus it's the first one that popped into my head when I saw this post. I'll be giving away my Eprom for free as well soon. As I have no use for it. I'll get it next time I bring my Xbox upstairs and plug it into my network. T've been wanting to give it away for the longest since I have no intention of ever going on live.
Post by: Marmite on March 10, 2003, 09:19:00 PM
(I made some of these, but I got most from places on the net)
Locker
An annoyed airline passenger
http://galileo.space...ite/locker.mpeg
Granny pull
You just gotta see this, it's the best one in the batch. Watch the grandma's feet...
http://galileo.space...grannypull.mpeg
Grandma Wassup
Like scary movie, a budwiser commercial
http://galileo.space...ndmawussup.mpeg
Grandma hang
I don't remember where I found this, but for some reason, my site wouldn't link to it as a flash object, so I had to rar it.
My Pen
Incredibly funny. Kids in the hall Pen sketch
http://galileo.space...rmite/Mypen.avi
A beach to yourself
Good idea...
bowling
Fun at the bowling ally
http://galileo.space...rmite/bowl.mpeg
Weird movie I made a couple of years ago
This is just a bizarre movie I made a couple of years ago. It's mostly dragon ball Z clips mixed with clips of random music. You could tell I was really bored that day.
http://galileo.space...rmite/Weird.avi
Post by: Lorenzo on March 10, 2003, 10:24:00 PM
lol
Post by: zimzamzoom on March 11, 2003, 09:31:00 AM
Post by: b0ink on March 11, 2003, 09:52:00 AM
A: Kids will eat boogers.
Don't need the EEPROM just thought I would chime in.
Post by: Marmite on March 11, 2003, 10:56:00 AM
| QUOTE (zimzamzoom @ Mar 11 2003, 12:31 PM) |
| Marmite - I tried to see your movies, but each time all it does is ask me if I want to set my home page to "www.blahblahblah.com" and doesn't find the file. |
thats funny, I got them to work on my comp... I'm sure you can find them by pasting the html into your browser, I'll edit it so you can see them.
EDIT: Updated it. But I just got the links to work through my school computer, so I don't know what is up.
Post by: desertboy on March 11, 2003, 02:02:00 PM
Post by: desertboy on March 11, 2003, 02:49:00 PM
| QUOTE (zimzamzoom @ Mar 11 2003, 11:39 PM) |
| Thanks for the eep! I may not be able to test it tonight (exams  ), but I'll do it asap!Thanks again! And hey it looks like your thread is getting pretty popular! |
Well they'll be another eprom coming soon for whoever I think deserves it most. It might be better if the moderator moved this to xbox live forum.
Post by: Marmite on March 11, 2003, 05:39:00 PM
Post by: desertboy on March 12, 2003, 03:56:00 AM
| QUOTE (Marmite @ Mar 12 2003, 02:39 AM) |
| did you check out my movies? |
I get 404's when I try to access.
sorry if this is double posted I thought I posted earlier but it doesn't seem to have registered. Probably forget to click add reply before I went work.
Post by: khanhdom on March 12, 2003, 08:09:00 AM
what did the left nut say to the right nut?
that thing in the middle thinks he's all hard......hahaha
Post by: darylzero on March 12, 2003, 02:05:00 PM
A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite
chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife,
"Quick, bring me a beer ." She looked
a little puzzled, but brought him a beer. When he
finished it, he said, "Quick, bring me another beer.
It's gonna start." This time she looked a little
angry, but brought him a beer. When it was gone he
said, "Quick, another beer before it starts." "That's
it!" she screams. "You bastard! You waltz in here,
flop your fat ass down, don't even say hello to me and
then expect me to run around like your slave. Don't
you realize that I cook and clean and wash and iron
all day long?" The husband sighed, "Shit, it
started..."
Post by: EriCCire on March 12, 2003, 02:17:00 PM
Post by: desertboy on March 13, 2003, 12:13:00 AM
"Fuck you nigga!" Responds the Rabbi.
Post by: desertboy on March 13, 2003, 04:25:00 PM
Post by: Marmite on March 13, 2003, 08:07:00 PM
I just thought I'd upload a couple of my videos to my website. Here are the links:
(I made some of these, but I got most from places on the net)
Locker
An annoyed airline passenger
http://galileo.space...ite/locker.mpeg
Granny pull
You just gotta see this, it's the best one in the batch. Watch the grandma's feet...
http://galileo.space...grannypull.mpeg
Grandma Wassup
Like scary movie, a budwiser commercial
http://galileo.space...ndmawussup.mpeg
Grandma hang
I don't remember where I found this, but for some reason, my site wouldn't link to it as a flash object, so I had to rar it.
http://galileo.space.../grannyhang.rar
My Pen
Incredibly funny. Kids in the hall Pen sketch
http://galileo.space...rmite/Mypen.avi
A beach to yourself
Good idea...
http://galileo.space...mite/beach.mpeg
bowling
Fun at the bowling ally
http://galileo.space...rmite/bowl.mpeg
Weird movie I made a couple of years ago
This is just a bizarre movie I made a couple of years ago. It's mostly dragon ball Z clips mixed with clips of random music. You could tell I was really bored that day.
http://galileo.space...rmite/Weird.avi
Post by: desertboy on March 14, 2003, 03:31:00 PM
Post by: leigao84 on March 14, 2003, 10:46:00 PM
Post by: desertboy on March 15, 2003, 03:09:00 AM
| QUOTE (zimzamzoom @ Mar 15 2003, 07:28 AM) |
| Just some positive words about desertboy! The eeprom I got from him is working beautifully. I was finally able to play Unreal on Live last night. (sniff) It was great... He's for real, and he da bomb! |
No problems and I will soon have another eprom to give away so keep postings your jokes and links I'm looking at them even if no one else is, the best one wins.
If you're wondering where I get eproms Zimzam's was mine off my chipped xbox the next one is going to be a friends who's got a 1.0 I'm chipping it in exchange for his eprom (that's how god damn nice I am, although he's too cheap to pay me anything, hence 1.0 still not chipped). I also chip xbox's all the time anyone who doesn't want a switch installed (Because they don't want to use live) gets their eprom ripped.
Post by: desertboy on March 16, 2003, 03:26:00 PM
I'm still taking offers for my next eprom.
Post by: ideasarebulletproof on April 05, 2003, 09:37:00 PM
| QUOTE (desertboy @ Mar 10 2003, 10:42 AM) |
Rules of competition 1. I reserve the right to give my eprom to whoever I feel like 2. In the event of a low response or lame jokes I'll give it someone else 3. No racist Jokes (Ones about Irish or women are OK) 4. No whiinging I'll ignore you |
*stabs desert boy in the eye with a dull and rusty fork for the Irish and women are OK line.*
here goes, but I'm no joke teller.
A man was on his daily jog through the woods one day when he
saw a tiny little girl sitting on a rock, crying her eyes out. He went
up to the little girl and asked her "What's wrong? Why are you
crying? Are you lost? Where are your parents?".
The little girl could not stop bawling, she just pointed over to a
near by ledge. The man proceeded to walk over to the ledge and
carefully looked over the side of it. At the bottom, down about
100ft, he saw the little girl's parents lying dead, their bodies
mangled from having fallen over the edge. So the man then turned
to the little girl, took off his pants and said "wow, I guess this just
really isn't your day, is it?"
Post by: desertboy on April 11, 2003, 12:04:00 AM
| QUOTE (ideasarebulletproof @ Apr 6 2003, 06:37 AM) |
| [/QUOTE] *stabs desert boy in the eye with a dull and rusty fork for the Irish and women are OK line.* here goes, but I'm no joke teller. A man was on his daily jog through the woods one day when he saw a tiny little girl sitting on a rock, crying her eyes out. He went up to the little girl and asked her "What's wrong? Why are you crying? Are you lost? Where are your parents?". The little girl could not stop bawling, she just pointed over to a near by ledge. The man proceeded to walk over to the ledge and carefully looked over the side of it. At the bottom, down about 100ft, he saw the little girl's parents lying dead, their bodies mangled from having fallen over the edge. So the man then turned to the little girl, took off his pants and said "wow, I guess this just really isn't your day, is it?" |
A woman goes on the Antiques roadshow and she shows the expert what appears to be an old tampon, bloodied and smelly.
"Your the expert, what period is that from?"
* Slaps ideasarebulletproof for being irish and a woman, now get back in that kitchen. *