Post by: buckwilliamsca on July 11, 2003, 08:34:00 AM
| QUOTE |
> > Other Axis of Evil Wannabees > > > > by John Cleese > > > > Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil", Libya, > > China and Syria today announced that they had formed the "Axis of Just as > > Evil", which they said would be more evil than that stupid Iran-Iraq-North > > Korea axis President Bush warned of in his State of the Union address. > > > > Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new Axis as > > having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right. They are just as evil. . > > . in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il. "Everybody > > knows we're the best evils . . . best at being evil . . . we're the best." > > > > Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, > > although they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil. > > "They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. "An > > axis can't have more than three countries", explained Iraqi President > > Saddam Hussien. "This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you > > had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So, you can only have > > three, and a secret handshake. Ours is wickedly cool." > > > > International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration was swift, as > > within minutes, France surrendered. > > > > Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in > > what has become a game of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan and Serbia > > announced that they had formed the "Axis of Somewhat Evil", forcing > > Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the "Axis of Occasionally > > Evil", while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the "Axis of Not > > So Much Evil Really as Just Generally Disagreeable". > > > > With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling > > up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the "Axis > > of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host > > the Olympics". > > > > Canada, Mexico and Australia formed the "Axis of Nations That Are Actually > > Quite Nice But Secretly Have Some Nasty Thoughts About America", while > > Scotland, New Zealand and Spain established the "Axis of Countries That > > Want Sheep to Wear Lipstick". "That's not a threat, really, just something > > we like to do", said Scottish Executive First Minister Jack McConnell. > > > > While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making > > fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for most axis, although he > > rejected the establishment of the "Axis of Counties Whose Names End in > > 'Guay", accusing one of its members of filing a false application. > > Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges. > > > > Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but privately > > world leaders said that's only because no one asked them. |
Got this in the mail a while ago, its pretty funny
