Really, the hyper-excited tone of the releases has to stop. It's immature, and smacks of poor business.
Really, read over the releases. YOu may as well replace them with this:
| QUOTE (ozXodusNewsMonkey @ Apr 21 2004, 03:17 PM) |
- We have giant balls. They're the size of bowling balls, or at least a respectable coconut. Those competitors of ours claim to have balls, but they don't. We'll show you our balls to prove it. In a few days.
- Along with out huge balls, we have giant dicks. Beware of fake dicks, they fall off. In fact, we can guarantee that all fake dicks will fall off. And if it's not our dick, it's a fake dick. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
- Anyone questioning the size of our genitalia should examine the size of our feet. We told you we have big feet before, and look at how we came through - Size 16 EEEs! We keep our promises. Big dicks are just around the corner.
- If you haven't caught the implication, none of our competitors have any genitalia whatsoever. Even if they did (which they don't) it would pale in comparison to the size of ours. Their balls quake in fear at the mere mention of our massive wang.
|
I mean HONESTLY now boys, give us a news item that's news. Don't give us more bragging and baiting. If I wanted that, I'd go argue about what operating system is better at slashdot.
I understand the need to market. I understand the need to make your product appear better than the competition. I understand the need to differentiate yourself. I just think there's a line that got crossed a long time ago. It almost makes me wish I'd gotten a SmartXX - at least their lack of English skills saves me from the marketing hogwash.
Just give me the details. Tell me what you're going to do, tell me what I need to know, but tone down the sensationalism and swagger.