Not for nothing, I had a great time yesterday, but I'm so glad Valentine's is over. I bought my girl this one-of-a-kind dustpan with her name engraved on it. You should've seen the look on her face. ...

... She was so happy because last year, I bought her the broom. All year she's been sweeping shit into her hands, and I kept telling her, "Wait till Valentine's, sweetheart."