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Author Topic: Donkey Balls  (Read 65 times)

bluedeath

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Donkey Balls
« on: May 05, 2004, 12:42:00 PM »

This is a true story from my first night at Marine Corps Boot Camp in July 96.

I go to Marine Corps boot camp at 17 right out of High School. I was naive as h*ll. My first night in MCRD San Diego is totally nuts from the yellow footprints to h*ll. You’re disoriented so you have to gain perspective quickly. One event from that horrible night will stay with me forever. This kid from Texas is in our makeshift platoon. We have just been issued all of our uniforms and everyone has made the 30-second change over except this kid. He is standing in the middle of the squad bay staring at the wall oblivious to the world in nothing but his boxers. A short mean Puerto Rican drill instructor goes up to him and yells "vat is da matta width you .... you nasthy recruit. . . Why do you still have nasthy civilan panthies on". This kid yells back in a Texas drawl "this recruit has unusually large balls". The drill instructor can't believe he just heard this and starts yelling at him in Spanish. Another drill instructor comes over and starts yelling at him. Again the kid says, " this recruit has unusually large balls". I am staring at this scene like WTF. Yet another drill instructor joins in at yelling at this kid. This kid stares at all of them and wips out the largest set of balls anyone has ever seen. This is the only occasion that I have ever seen where every drill instructor in a squad bay simultaneously says WTF at the same time. The DIs lose it. Turns out that this kid has elephantitis of the balls.
He is a legend on the depot.
I met him again in Darwin Australia for training operation southern frontier and we repelled down the side of the water tower in Darwin and wrote his nickname on that tower.

DONKEY BALLS was here.
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buttface96

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Donkey Balls
« Reply #1 on: May 05, 2004, 02:48:00 PM »

ROFLMAO, thats so discusting
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nemt

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Donkey Balls
« Reply #2 on: May 05, 2004, 03:00:00 PM »

Wait wait wait, backup, you were a marine?

No wonder it took decades to get rid of saddam.
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Fuzzy

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Donkey Balls
« Reply #3 on: May 05, 2004, 04:29:00 PM »

If he had elephantits of the tescicles he would not be wearing regular boxers, he would be wearing specially made pants. It is a serious problem.
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lebriznon

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Donkey Balls
« Reply #4 on: May 06, 2004, 06:23:00 PM »

ohmy.gif
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bluedeath

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Donkey Balls
« Reply #5 on: May 07, 2004, 04:59:00 AM »

He joined the marines to get free surgery.  They were bigger than tennis balls.  He did not wear pants 99% of the time before he joined.
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green_beetle

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Donkey Balls
« Reply #6 on: May 07, 2004, 05:02:00 AM »

why we talking about giant testicles for?
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