No worries, I didn't think you'd taken it personally,

I just thought that I would clarify that I wasn't saying this was the answer to any post in particular on here, just something to keep in mind.
Having a crossover cable is actually handy, as you can connect 2 pcs directly or pc direct to satellite box and all modern routers will autosense a crossover cable so they can be used normally to connect to routers, but in the case of this jtag setup they can be a complete pain.
As for a reverse wired coupler that is correct, the RJ45 plugs face each other, so if pin 1 was on the left, then on the other side pin 1 would be on the left so they must be reverse wired, they can't be wired straight through, that would give pin 1 to 8, 2 to 7, 3 to 6 etc. they can only be wired straight through if 1 RJ45 male is inserted flipped.
MDI/MDI-X auto-switching is also present in the majority of new Ethernet cards, so the need for having crossover cables is becoming less and less. Just an FYI